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Some callers needed to cry after a break-up with their soul mates. Some were the characters in darker stories involving abusive boyfriends, too many nights of too many drinks, or feelings of hopelessness after not earning an expected "A" on a midterm. Some simply needed to talk about their fears, their hopes, their dreams, and their concerns. As I listened on the other end, I tried to offer comfort and support, and hopefully some coping strategies. Mostly, I just listened. And, without knowing it, I quietly found my calling.
As a volunteer counselor at Headquarters, the 24-hour crisis counseling hotline in Lawrence, Kansas, I spent four hours per week during my senior year of college answering crisis calls, recording notes in a log book, and engaging in on-going training. We spent all of our free time in role-plays, practicing how to handle a suicidal caller or talking to a scared child until his mom got home from work. After returning from a year of studying abroad in France, I had decided to make a commitment to a long-term volunteer project. I chose Headquarters because my friends had always told me that I listened well, and I thought I might enjoy helping people by talking to them on the phone.
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During the six-month training period, I learned how to actively listen, how to ask clarifying questions, and how to guide a conversation with open-ended "what" and "how"questions to keep open-ended "what" and "how" questions to keep the conversation flowing. The three-hour training sessions were intense, often exhausting, and emotionally draining, but for me, the time flew. Once I graduated to answering phones, my enthusiasm multiplied. Making a positive connection with a distraught caller produced a sense of accomplishment and joy that I rarely experienced. I was finally doing something that filled me with energy, and I sensed that I had a talent for it.
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"I was finally doing something that filled me with energy, and I sensed that I had a talent for it." |
After I graduated from college, I spent a year working as a legal assistant at a small law firm. My career decision was influenced by a) a lukewarm interest in attending law school and b) an overwhelming sense of uncertainty about what else to do. After one week at the firm, I realized that I would be a terrible attorney. After acknowledging that a career in the law would not be a good fit for me, I focused my energy on transcribing dictation, scheduling appointments, and trying to figure out what in the world I wanted to do with my life. It dawned on me that I wanted to work full-time at Headquarters, helping people assess their choices and walk down a different path. I loved that work with a passion, and I knew, in the deepest sense of myself, that I was perhaps called to it. So I stayed at the firm for one year and then enrolled in a graduate program in Counseling Psychology where I learned, formally, how to be a full-time Headquarters professional.
Now I work as a career advisor at the Career Center, and every day I try to listen actively, ask clarifying questions, and guide conversations with open-ended "what" and "how" questions to keep the conversation flowing. Each day I have the privilege of working with students who are in the process of trying to find their voices and their places in the world of work, and I have the honor of being a listener, companion, and guide on that journey as they assess their choices and walk down a variety of paths.
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| "My volunteer experience at Headquarters allowed me to develop skills that I never knew I owned and to discover work that today brings me a tremendous amount of fulfillment." |
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My volunteer experience at Headquarters allowed me to develop skills that I never knew I owned and to discover work that today brings me a tremendous amount of fulfillment. Now, when I meet with a student, we talk about service experiences and I listen for a lilt in the voice or a brightening of the eyes. More often than not, these narratives offer insight into that individual's true calling. The delight found in tutoring a child with Each One, Teach One, serving as a cooking captain with S.T.O.N.E. soup, or building a house with Habitat for Humanity might unearth skills that would lead to a fulfilling career in educational policy, organizational development, or urban planning. We must dig deeply and listen carefully to find these themes, but once we do, the patterns of skills and interests start to become clear. |
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Any opportunity to "try on" a career for a short period of time, whether through service, internships, or research, allows us to both discover unknown career paths and to confirm (or reject) the natural fit of a career choice. This concept, called "experiential learning," is infused in the practice of career coaching. Sometimes the time that we devote willingly and activities that we join of our own accord reflect our true passions. Service is one window to help us see if these passions might translate into a career.
Frederick Buechner defined vocation as "the place where your deep gladness meets the world's deep need." Volunteering as a crisis counselor at Headquarters allowed me to find the place where my deep gladness met a deep need. Serve with joy and abandon, and listen carefully. Your calling is waiting to be found.
Aimee Wittman
Career Development Specialist
The Career Center
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